I talked to hundreds of women about this and they all agreed that the very best gift a guy could give them is to become their friend. You would be surprised that so many women are dying for a man to be their friend. Friendship, in many ways, is even more special than romance or sex and a relationship that develops from friendship is extremely enduring and satisfying.

The sad part is that so many men today are so eager to seduce a woman that they forget all about being her friend. Most of the time they don’t even like her. A man that allows himself to become close to a woman and become her friend can only make the vibes between them more exciting and intimate.

The most successful pickup artists are men who truly enjoy the company of women. A woman is a lot freer with a man who opens up to her, lets her know how terrific she is, and allows friendship to develop between them. Love is a little more than sex plus friendship. But for love to appear, friendship has to be there first. I missed out on one of the sexiest and nicest girls in the world because I didn’t know the value of friendship.

I first met Bonnie in my second year in college. She sat next to me in Psychology class. She was breathtaking in her beauty. She had long black hair and a shape that wouldn’t quit. We were picked to write a project together. We became very close friends because we had to study together. I remember many times sitting next to Bonnie that I became misty eyed because she was so pretty and smelled so good. I thought to myself, ‘Why couldn’t she be more than just a friend? Many of my buddies saw us studying together and told me that they would like to have a friend like her. Bonnie and I became a twosome around college. I figured she regarded me just like a brother and would never consider me more than a friend.

Bonnie and I went our separate ways and I ran into her about ten years later. I saw her at a shopping mall one evening. I was married at the time, about to get divorced, and Bonnie was as beautiful as ever. She was married to a doctor. She shocked me by what she told me. She admitted to me that I was the best friend she ever had in college and that because I was so close to her that she fell in love with me. She never told me that because she figured that I wasn’t interested. I couldn’t believe it. Here I thought she considered me just a friend, but because I became her friend she fell in love with me. I missed out because I didn’t know how high women value friendship from men.

I no longer make that mistake. Because I become friends with nearly all women I have dated, I have had dozens of women fall in love with me. Do not throw away this chance. The next woman you meet, become her friend and you won’t be sorry.

Wayne Ross has written several books on meeting and dating women.

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